Day 62 of AY20-21: our final day of 2020

Tuesday, December 22nd, was day 62 of the Abrome pandacademic year, the last day of cycle four, and our last day of 2020. It’s been quite a ride thus far, in spite of all of the disruption and struggle faced by members of our community and by society at large.

How many moons?!

How many moons?!

At the remote cell’s morning meeting, we all shared what was one thing we would each do over next two weeks (of break): finish building a house in Minecraft, breathe, breathe, hang out with friends online, and work on myself. We then quickly turned the conversation to the Saturn-Jupiter great conjunction that happened the night before. While I had made time to see it earlier in the week, when Saturn and Jupiter were getting closer and closer to each other, I did not make it out early enough to observe the planets closer together in the night sky than they have been for 800 years. I was kicking myself for missing a rare event until I realized that even though it’s been 800 years to this point, I only have to wait 60 years for the next one on March 15, 2080! I’ll only be a couple years over the century mark by that time. Another Learner said that while he was watching a livestream of it, they were talking about the moons that were visible which led him to begin researching the moons of Jupiter. So much for Self-Directed Educated kids not wanting to learn if they’re not forced to by a teacher. I pulled up some images of the celestial event and remarked that the four moons of Jupiter were surprisingly visible. Two Learners quickly corrected me on that, as the four Galilean moons were visible, but Jupiter has 79 moons!

The mixed-age setting of Abrome benefits both the older and younger Learners

The mixed-age setting of Abrome benefits both the older and younger Learners

The in-person cell had a fun and challenging day. There was lots of hanging out on this day between Learners young and old. The combination of our commitment to mixed-age groups and keeping our cells no larger than nine people (including Facilitators) means that sometimes the Learners get frustrated not having more same-aged peers with them. However, the mixed-age setting should be a defining feature of an education setting as it helps to eliminate the desire for Learners to create hierarchies among same-aged peers that produce real harm among Learners (e.g., cliques, judgement, bullying). For example, if there are a bunch of 13-year-olds together there will be a desire for the Learners to start judging where they rank in terms of popularity, looks, athletic ability, etc., but when it is a collection of young people who range in age from 6-years-old to 16-years-old there is much less of a need to compare oneself to others. Further, younger Learners are able to look up to and mimic older Learners, while older Learners develop empathy and leadership skills, and they take on a nurturing role with younger Learners.

Having seen Facilitator Ariel and an adolescent Learner biking one day the prior week, a younger Learner decided to bring his bike on our last day of 2020. The Learner really likes to test the boundaries of his capabilities, and this can sometimes scare other Learners and be a cause for concern for the Facilitators. But Facilitator Ariel made sure to let the Learner know that he only wanted to ride with him if he could commit to safe practices. The Learner said that worked for him, and then Facilitator Ariel followed up with a concern about the young Learner biking without his shoes on. So the Learner put his shoes on and they took off biking.

Shooting at something with a magic wand?

Shooting at something with a magic wand?

Back where the rest of the Learners were, the two other young Learners were involved in a variety of ever evolving games and exploration. As the pandemic numbers continue to worsen in Central Texas we expected that the county would declare risk stage level five at some point in the cycle, and when they did we would revert to a fully remote experience. We were already committed to one remote cell since we were in stage level four. For kids who suffer in conventional school settings, remote learning can be a godsend, as it allows them to escape the constant judgement, stress, and demands of schooling. But for our Self-Directed Education community, we have no Learners who benefit from a fully remote experience, as one of the benefits of SDE is the ability to come together and pursue interests with others who do not try to manipulate or control the Learners. Seeing these Learners engaging and playing really is a thing of beauty in a world that insists on locking kids down in even non-pandemic times.

The prospective Learner who was wrapping up his shadow was still feeling things out, and part of that included testing boundaries. For example, that morning he lightly but intently poked some folks with a stick and waited for a reaction. Facilitator Ariel gave him feedback telling him, “please do not touch him from my knees up to … the top of my head.” So the shadower then tapped him in the shins. This is not uncommon at Abrome when new people join the community, because when we tell Learners they are free, they want to see if we really mean it. Lots of schools might tell students that they’ve turned the school upside down and that the students are in charge, but the students learn quickly that they are only in charge of a tiny range of options that the adults have laid out for them. Quite frankly the schools should stop doing that because it is a form of gaslighting.

While we fundamentally believe in autonomy for all people, we are also a psychologically safe community that is anti-oppressive and consensus based. Or at least we are constantly striving to be one. So the poking incident was a great opportunity to express to the Learner that freedom does not mean license, and that our freedom includes accountability to one another. And although these conversations can be difficult for young people, especially young people who have only ever known rules and demands of them, they help the Learners to recognize the potential of freedom within their lives and how it can be used to support them and everyone else in the community.

The younger Learners, a six-year-old and an eight-year-old, who were playing a variety of games later broke a glass bottle that was in the dried out river bed. When asked what happened the Learners plainly stated, “we found it and decided to break it.” Abrome’s non-reliance on punishment opens up more opportunities for honesty from Learners, particularly when they know they may have done something harmful. But that does not mean that they enjoy having a conversation about it. As Facilitator Lauren attempted to engage them so that they could think through what compelled them to break it, and what the consequences of the act could be on others, the Learners started to walk away. Facilitator Lauren followed them because this was one of those moments they actually needed to discuss what happened because the Learners violated the Abrome agreements that every member of the community committed to. In particularly, the principle of taking care of others and taking care of the space. She said, “I need you to stop. We need to acknowledge what happened and we need to make it safe. We need to fix it.” Facilitator Lauren was concerned about them cutting themselves so she did not insist that they pick up the glass, but she did insist that they be with her while she cleaned it up. They started to point out where the pieces of glass were among the rocks, and then they all discussed why it was unsafe. One Learner said that it was no big deal because he could just walk around it, and that people could walk around it too. Facilitator Lauren struck a chord when she asked what would happen if a raccoon cut its foot. They acknowledged that it might not be able to move around for food and water. This was an example of how Abrome approaches difficult situations without relying on punishments. By doing so, we are able to have meaningful conversations rooted in trust and respect, that allow us to focus on the ethics of a situation instead of compliance and looking good in the eyes of others.

Back in the remote cell I had a scheduled check-in with one of the older Learners. She messaged me on Discord and said that we should cancel the meeting because there was no point in meeting. I asked her to explain and she said she had a rough week and was not thinking about the topic of the meeting. I said we should have the meeting anyway, as it was scheduled and I had made plans to be there, and that we could discuss her week or anything else. When she got on the call I reaffirmed that we did not have to dwell on the original topic, and we soon found our conversation drifting to all the ways that she wants her life to be after Abrome. Some of the conversation touched upon her desire to someday get a college degree, so I asked her if she wanted to take some community college courses. She said she did but that she had no idea how she could go about that or pay for it. I challenged her on that, asking her how she could find out if it was possible, and we then talked through what it means to look up that information and reach out to people who can help. It was a nice conversation and as I left she continued to scroll through the website of Austin Community College.

What an amazing quetzalcoatlus nest

What an amazing quetzalcoatlus nest

Back at the in-person cell the shadower was sharing the snacks he brought for the last day of his shadow. He was super excited to be able to offer something to the community and the community was super excited to try out his gluten-free, nut-free, dairy-free vegan treats. He brought enough for each person to have two of them, although not everyone wanted to eat two treats.

Imaginative play continued on this last day of the cycle, and calendar year. One of the Learners decided that he was going to build a replica of a quetzalcoatlus nest, and then chose to reenact what it might have looked like for one to hatch. It was an impressive display, and everyone was sure to keep their distance in case the mother was ready to swoop in to protect her hatchling.

As the day wound to a close I held one final afternoon roundup with the remote cell. The Learners reflected on one thing they did that day or one thing they appreciated: being with family, writing music, watching Vikings (tv show), finishing a book, writing a blog post, letting chickens out of their coop, cleaning out a shelf in their room where they found old stories that were pretty funny, and working on art. The last to go was the older Learner I had a meeting with and the thing she said she appreciated was our chat. Then she addressed everyone and announced that she was officially signed up for college.